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I agree Lola21st, Marriage is a covenant. I heard someone make a statement on the radio a few days ago saying that non-christians should not even get married. This caught my attention. I thought it was such a horrible statement to make. I then heard the man make the statement that marriage was created by God. Then I really thought about it and I could actually understand the meaning behind the statement. Marriage was and is a creation from God. If you claim to not believe in God...then why follow? Here is the first marriage...created by God Gen. 2:18, 21-24 The Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him'...and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man.' For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. Enough of that...Let's move on.... The basic underlying reason marriages fail is due to satan. satan wants to destroy the marriage because of it's basic foundation/model of Christ and the Church. When satan destroys the marriage, this destruction spirals to other areas. Eph 5:21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Eph 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. Eph 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Eph 5:24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so [let] the wives [be] to their own husbands in every thing. Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; Eph 5:26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, Eph 5:27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. Eph 5:28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. Eph 5:29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: Eph 5:30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. Eph 5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. Eph 5:32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Eph 5:33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife [see] that she reverence [her] husband. We live in a society that has the "ME" syndrome. If it feels good then do it. If it doesn't feel good and you don't feel like doing it, then don't do it. They rely on their emotions. What does satan play on?....our emotions. satan has managed to plant seeds in the minds of many people that make people believe that marriage is suppose to be happy all the time; a false view of marriage. How many times have you heard the phrase....."Marriage takes work"? I have several hundred times. How many times have you heard " Love is not easy"? I have to say about the same as the other. These are true statements. We just never practice them. How many people really listen to the standard marriage vows? “I, (Jane Doe), take you (John Doe), to be my (wife/husband), to have and hold from this day on, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; until death do us part.” If you really look at the standard marriage vow....you are agreeing to have good times....bad times....times when you are sick.....times when you are well....times when you have money....times when you don't have money.... agreeing to love and cherish....and all this till death splits you apart. You take this vow with your spouse before witnesses and before God. I think it is safe to say most people, not all, who divorce base their reasonings due to the fact that they feel unhappy with their spouse. They feel like something is missing or they drifted apart. They are correct in saying something is missing. They are missing the joy of the Lord! Until you find the oneness with Christ, you will never find the happiness that you are seeking. However, most people think the spouse is suppose to make them happy. Incorrect statement.......Christ is to be the source of your joy, your spouse just adds to it. John 15:10-12 (New International Version) 10If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. 11I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. 12My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 1 Chronicles 16:27 Splendor and majesty are before him; strength and joy in his dwelling place Job 20:5 that the mirth of the wicked is brief, the joy of the godless lasts but a moment. Proverbs 10:28 The prospect of the righteous is joy, but the hopes of the wicked come to nothing. Psalm 19:8 The precepts of the LORD are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the LORD are radiant, giving light to the eyes One major problem I see today is in found in Titus Chapter 2 We as a church do not train up our youth. Titus 2 (New International Version) Titus 2 What Must Be Taught to Various Groups 1You must teach what is in accord with sound doctrine. 2Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance. 3Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. 6Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. 7In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness 8and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us. I am speaking as a woman. We as woman do not help the men fight against sexual immorality by the way we dress, the way we talk and the way we act. God has given men and women different gifts that make us different....but together.....one. Men are given a stronger sex drive than women. Woman are given a stronger compassion than men. When we look at the man and he has a strong sex drive....are woman helping the men by wearing "sexy clothing to church" or going as far as posing in pornographic films or books? No, our men are being set up for failure. It's kind of like putting an alcoholic at the bar and telling him not to drink. These things set up satan's demonic strongholds in our men's minds. Not only does a man need hedges to protect him for sexual sin, it works both ways. We need hedges put in place by both genders for protection and respect for others. I can go on and on and on....but I am running out of time for the day.....I will pick up later. God's Blessings on all!