I understand where you are coming from I have felt like this for the most part of my life since I was about 4 or 5 trying to fit in playing with my older cousins. I am 29 now will be 30 next year. As God has matured and has given me revelations about my life, my purpose, my ministry for him. I see that everytime I didn't fit in i was always the girl that got picked on , hair pulled, talked about jumped in the locker room during gym. I have come to learn that then I was not supposed to fit in I was already "set apart" even then that why the enemy will work so hard to attack my self esteem and in fact he did .I carried it and it became a stronghold through being a teenager to an young adult I had struggled with so many insecurities when you do the so-called normal teenager and young adult things like going to parties and dates and so forth. It was so funny to me because even then when I thought I had finally achieved the being popular status quote there is always someone there or God send someone there to remind you. Hey what are you doing here you don't even look like you belong here and you don't belong here and go HOME and to be honest it was the God honest truth. I look back at it now and just laugh with JOY because the Lord broke me free from the bondage of those strongholds, I am growing and knowing who i am in him I am like Wow I was predestined to be here before he even thought of me in my mothers womb, I am set apart and set aside, being molded trained for the masters' use HALLELUJAH I PRAISE HIM because of thethings I could have gotten into the roads i could have went down he is definite a keeper and most definitely the lifter up of my head. I THANK YOU LORD. MJ as far your relationships in church i once felt that way too and it can be a hurtful and alone type of feeling. I am a loving person and I give love and show love. I was yearning for that within my church family. I 've been at my church for a little over 5 yrs now God had me there to heal first, once healing and deliverance took place I was there to learn, study my word ,seek the presence of God. He had me set apart for a reason there was some things that he was trying to get out of me and some things that he was trying to put into to me. You have to be careful and be strong in your spirit regarding of who you let into your spirit. Everyone that goes to church as we may all want to believe are all saints but I am sure we know the ones that are not. I get along well with anyone and I show my self friendly all the time They actually call me SMILEY at church that's just my personality, but with that i did feel like i didn't fit in for a long time. BUT how wonderful God is when its time or God's timing He'll bring the friends to you who he wants you to have. The friends that I chose at my church the Lord removed them from my life and they caused me some heartache. But he replaced that friend with many more I am so blessed to have them in my life and I know that they'll be with me for a lifetime and they are there for my husband and kids we all do functions together go out to eat and just fellowship When God does it he does right the way it's supposed to be and whover he puts in your life will be someone that ca deposit into your life naturally and spiritually and you will be able to do the same for them. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers may God continue to bless i like your name too Missouri that's a Unique name for someone that is "set apart".
I understand where you are coming from I have felt like this for the most part of my life since I was about 4 or 5 trying to fit in playing with my older cousins. I am 29 now will be 30 next year. As God has matured and has given me revelations about my life, my purpose, my ministry for him. I see that everytime I didn't fit in i was always the girl that got picked on , hair pulled, talked about jumped in the locker room during gym. I have come to learn that then I was not supposed to fit in I was already "set apart" even then that why the enemy will work so hard to attack my self esteem and in fact he did .I carried it and it became a stronghold through being a teenager to an young adult I had struggled with so many insecurities when you do the so-called normal teenager and young adult things like going to parties and dates and so forth. It was so funny to me because even then when I thought I had finally achieved the being popular status quote there is always someone there or God send someone there to remind you. Hey what are you doing here you don't even look like you belong here and you don't belong here and go HOME and to be honest it was the God honest truth. I look back at it now and just laugh with JOY because the Lord broke me free from the bondage of those strongholds, I am growing and knowing who i am in him I am like Wow I was predestined to be here before he even thought of me in my mothers womb, I am set apart and set aside, being molded trained for the masters' use HALLELUJAH I PRAISE HIM because of thethings I could have gotten into the roads i could have went down he is definite a keeper and most definitely the lifter up of my head. I THANK YOU LORD. MJ as far your relationships in church i once felt that way too and it can be a hurtful and alone type of feeling. I am a loving person and I give love and show love. I was yearning for that within my church family. I 've been at my church for a little over 5 yrs now God had me there to heal first, once healing and deliverance took place I was there to learn, study my word ,seek the presence of God. He had me set apart for a reason there was some things that he was trying to get out of me and some things that he was trying to put into to me. You have to be careful and be strong in your spirit regarding of who you let into your spirit. Everyone that goes to church as we may all want to believe are all saints but I am sure we know the ones that are not. I get along well with anyone and I show my self friendly all the time They actually call me SMILEY at church that's just my personality, but with that i did feel like i didn't fit in for a long time. BUT how wonderful God is when its time or God's timing He'll bring the friends to you who he wants you to have. The friends that I chose at my church the Lord removed them from my life and they caused me some heartache. But he replaced that friend with many more I am so blessed to have them in my life and I know that they'll be with me for a lifetime and they are there for my husband and kids we all do functions together go out to eat and just fellowship When God does it he does right the way it's supposed to be and whover he puts in your life will be someone that ca deposit into your life naturally and spiritually and you will be able to do the same for them. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers may God continue to bless i like your name too Missouri that's a Unique name for someone that is "set apart".
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY MIA, MY BIRTHDAY IS TOMORROW 9/14 i HOPE YOU HAD A GREAT AND BLESSED DAY.