BOB!S WIFE

[madsod 0]

Bob receives a text from his neighbor.

I am so sorry Bob.
I've been riddled with guilt and I have to confess. I have been tapping your wife, day and night when you're not around. In fact, more than you. I'm not getting any at home, but that's no excuse. I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apology with my promise that it won't happen again.

Bob, anguished and betrayed, grabbed his gun, went into his bedroom, and without a word, shot his wife and killed her...................










A few moments later, a second text came in:

Damn autocorrect.

I meant "wifi", not "wife".

[Tony nitrous 0]

The FBI had an opening for an assassin. 

After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were 3 finalists; Two men and a woman.

For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.

'We must know that you will follow your Instructions no matter what the 
circumstances.

Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair .... Kill her!!'

The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could Never shoot my 
wife.'

The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man For this job. Take your wife and go home.'

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet forabout 5 minutes.

The man came out with tears in his eyes, 'I tried, But I can't kill my wife.' The agent said, 'You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.'

Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls.. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat from her brow. 
 
 
 
 
 
 

'This gun is loaded with blanks' she said. 
'I had to kill him with the chair'

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