Request for personal prayer...very tired heart

[manicmusician 0]

I would really appreciate all of the prayers that my brothers and sisters in the Lord here would offer.

In the past year, I have been outright betrayed by three people very close to me. I don't mean had a disagreement with. I mean literally, unexpectedly thrown under the bus for no obvious, rational reason. Each has been painful in it's own unique way. Each has come completely out of left field from people who would seem to be solid at the time and have no real reason to turn on me. The most recent just a few hours ago from a relative whom I have helped in ways you can't imagine, mentored when no one else would give this person the time of day, and loved when no one else on earth would. I am/was literally this person's only friend in human form. What started as a normal phone call ended with this person misunderstanding a situation and threatening violence toward me and my immediate family. This relative has a history of violent behavior, and I have tried my best to be a source of stability when everyone else had discarded him. I don't fear him, personally, as I trust God to protect me, but I fear a boundary might have been breached that will be next to impossible to repair even with forgiveness.

This is all very crushing, and when emotion is invested like in these situations, it's hard to get out from under the weight of the hurt even when giving it to the Lord. I know that I have a High Priest who certainly understands betrayal.

My health has been suffering dramatically from the stress and pain of the situations. I have gone from a vibrant, healthy 210 pounds to 150 pounds in a matter of months, have no appetite and am having some potentially major health issues due to malnourishment and lack of sleep, and have grown weary of force-feeding myself as it didn't seem to be working anyway.

All of this has hampered my ability to work, minister, and even pray.
Needless to say, with my work hindered, I'm not exactly rolling in cash at present. I know God is able, I'm just so tired, and there's strength in numbers. My heart is so tired. I can't begin to imagine how to describe how tired my heart is.

Thank you for your prayers.

[HisLightbeam 0]

Manicmusic, I don't know you, but I want to pray for you right. Father thank you for forgiving us for our sins, and for cleansing us with the precious blood of your son, Jesus Christ. Father, we are coming to your throne today to intercede for your child, Manicmusic. Your love heals broken hearts, and you protect us from things in ways that we don't know about everyday, Father. Father, I pray that you restore Manic's vibrancy for life in your word, because your word is life. Help him go forward from this point, where his family member has allowed the enemy of our souls to cause chaos, confusion. We know that this is not of you, because you are a God of decency and order. But we also know that You can use this situation for Manic's good. Father, I ask you to remove any distraction and distruction that this man is causing in Manic's life. I pray Your strength in Manic's life. I pray Your peace in Manic's life. Lord, I pray also for Manic's family member, that you will bring peace and healing into this man's life in all areas. Nobody can be everything that he needs except You. Nothing anyone can do for him will ever be enough unless he comes to You, the living water, to quench his thirst and dry up the bitter root that is in him. No matter what happened to make him bitter, Lord, please soften his heart so that he can see, and accept, his part in the way that his life has played out, whether it was jail-time, or drugs, or a financial struggle-even this estrangement from his family members...Let him see and accept and repent of his sins, so that new relationships can be defined, and so that he can share fellowship once again with Manic and Manic's family.
One a more personal note, Manic, sometimes when we are going to higher levels of ministry in God, the first things to go are the things that will hinder us. IE, friends that would distract us from doing what God has planned for us. Please enjoy your life. The stomach is for food and food is for the stomach, but the Lord will destroy them both...I cor. 6-13 partial...so enjoy your life. Take 24 hours at a time. I pray for your heart to be healed. You sound like a wonderful person, and if your gifting is music, then you know the crucial part that you play in the worship of God. Remember how David played for King Saul and the evil spirit that was buffeting Saul would depart? Only an anointed man of God, playing under the anointing can do that. Or when Elisha called for a harpist and the spirit of God came on him so that he prophesied to Jehosaphat and Ahab. And remember how the Lord commanded that when the Israelites worshipped, that skillful singers and musicians were to be part of the worship. Man of God, I pray strength into you, and peace to you. Love, Mary