Re: Husband should go away for good without problem or i die

[dreams3 0]

thank you all for your prayer support.

God granted me favour with the social aid inspite of my name in my husband business.they are helping me now ..so i am so grateful.

2ndly i went to see an apartment which is better situated close to my kids schools and my job. And exactly the range the social welfare can pay. The women at home were so surprise that i could find a place so soon while some have to stay up to 2 years in the public home still searching. Geting an appartment in the city is very very impossible becos of demand and high cost even for a foreigner is worse. I know God is my source and Godfather. But we are still waiting for response from the owner whether he is giving us or not. this is one week now. I dont know why he has not..the women head as made several calls but could not get him..meanwhile he has promised her to give the apartment. Today she send an email we are waiting for the response. Please pray for us..i really want us to start settliing down fast ..that is my kids...is not easy for them in the public house.

I have left this matter in Gods hands Good or bad. Because i cannot get or secure an apartment here! Only with him it is possible and i dont want to change the kids school the 3rd time neither. i donot want stress for them or me.

thanks as u support us and God do for you your desires too.

[dreams3 0]

I forget to add. My husband was able to see the kids for the first time i left but what sadden me is that he is trying to bring the kids into our issues. The first thing my daughter said to me when the dad brought them back was that dad said you dont like him anymore is that true mama? i was speechless how could he ? meanwhile i tell the kids good about their dad.

i have been praying ever since for my kids. i know i cant stop him seeing them or saying things to them but please pray for Gods intervention too.

[Cholette 0]

Well, I'm estatic for you because I know that was a trying time for you transitioning to this place...Praise God!

Your husband bringing the kids into the situation is a deal breaker and he needs to know that your ADULT issues stay between ADULTS. That is plain manipulation and we bind that spirit in the name of Jesus!!!

Continuing in the prayer for you...

[lola21st 2]

Hi dreams3 -

Praise God for His faithfulness, He is showing you that He's your everpresent help in times of trouble. You are doing so well handling everything, remember that you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. Know that God's hand is in this situation and He is working this whole thing out for your good. Stay in lockstep with Him and don't take your eyes off of Him. He is guiding you through this storm and it's critical that you walk by faith and not by sight so that you can successfully navigate through. Be encouraged, no matter what it looks like now, you are going to be fine. If God be for you who can be against you?

[dreams3 0]

thank u all.

now i got a call yesterday that my husband want is family back from a family friend because he does not have my new tele no.. i was like after 2 months separation.. and our official seperation is just in 3 weeks time. What does he means. his he serious. so i asked him is he ready to pay any cost to get his family back. He answered his family is his number one priority so he is ready to pay any cost for it. so i remind him the first conditions i laid before i left him and the cost of paying back the people that have help me this 2 months and to write and sign officially his intentions to the women and government authorities who are helping me. That is if he really what his family back. Or else i am still going ahead with the Separation/Divorce. So i gave him time to think. So please just pray and let me know what is this. I have already made my mind to separate but is God in this?..i just want peace in my life ..i dont want more trouble.

[lola21st 2]

Hi dreams3 -

I'm praying that the Lord gives you a special anointing of wisdom and discernment in this situation. Please move with caution. Many times spouses (especially those who abuse their spouse) will plead for forgiveness and ask for another chance to work on the marriage. Nothing wrong with that but given the small amount of time that's passed, pleas like that are often a manipulative attempt to get back together and have things go back to the way that they were (where the spouse was in control) instead of working on the relationship and creating a new marriage that makes both partners (as well as the children) happy. It would be better to see him working on the issues that you raised and demonstrating over an extended period of time (months if not years) that he has truly changed and that his heart has changed. That way when you reconcile the chances of things returning to the way that they were are much lower.....

[Cholette 0]

lola21st wrote:

Hi dreams3 -

I'm praying that the Lord gives you a special anointing of wisdom and discernment in this situation. Please move with caution. Many times spouses (especially those who abuse their spouse) will plead for forgiveness and ask for another chance to work on the marriage. Nothing wrong with that but given the small amount of time that's passed, pleas like that are often a manipulative attempt to get back together and have things go back to the way that they were (where the spouse was in control) instead of working on the relationship and creating a new marriage that makes both partners (as well as the children) happy. It would be better to see him working on the issues that you raised and demonstrating over an extended period of time (months if not years) that he has truly changed and that his heart has changed. That way when you reconcile the chances of things returning to the way that they were are much lower.....

Please pay attention to this advice ...PLEASE!!!

[dreams3 0]

Thank for this advices. i intend to be very cautious. i donot intend to get back. i love my independent.i am still sticking to my guns. He wants us to meet..maybe on sunday. I want to tell him if he is not ready for those conditions and demonstrate in the course of the months a change and let just be friends for now and prayer over it with time and if Gods willing shall be together again. But if not then God has other plans.

i really need advice from you guys. Anyway i have been praying asking God for wisdom and direction should i give him a chance or not , does he mean it, etc...and if at all i will give him a chance we have to start all over again with the relationship as friends until i see and and i am convinced...if not it is byebye. Everyone has to be involve with me on this ..pastors, family, godly friends etc before any attempt to go back.

[dreams3 0]

Thank you all once again for your prayer support. Today i was able to sit down and talk candidly and to assess my husband why does he want his family back ..for real(self realisation) or to avoid paying family support and the business name? I told him yes we can have the second chance at our marriage starting afresh, marriage couseling, soul couseling, courtship etc for the good of us and especially for the overall health of the kids...but i am not packing back until there is change and that i need time for myself. But i realised he still has not realised that we have been in a abused/unhealthy marriage relationship and why i have to separate. He talked about the bills, court case and child supports he has to pay(he has no money for all these) and that if i want to go ahead with the official separation he will go direct for divorce and fight for the kids custody not minding bringing false accussation against me and on the business or run away with the kids etc. At the end i told him i love him but i want us to rebuild our marriage and sure this will involve the costs like child supports, my name from the business and living separately until we can get back together in same house... But if he does not want he can go ahead and file/fight/false accused me but knowing that God will fight for me and the kids. In the end, i told him whatever he chooses and if he loves the kids, he should leave the kids out of our issue if not he will regret(fall in the pit he wants to dig himself). I told him to communicate to me what he has decide to me...at least i will know.

Please pray for me and especially for my kids. A friend told me some weeks ago she had a dream where my husband ran away with the kids to(i know he cannot care for the kids even though he loves them) his country. I want my kids to grow up knowing God and stable.

Pray that God will turn all evil plans or ways he(my husband) wants to choose against me and the kids to nothing and to realise that God is with me and i am for his(husband) good.

Thanks

[princessdelia 0]

2 Tim 4:18 - And God will deliver me from every evil work and preserve me for His heavenly kingdom. To Him be the glory forever and ever. Amen.

That's the Word for you

[dreams3 0]

Thanks for princessdelia and others for your prayers. i am officially separated from my husband. The kids are with me. But feeling emotionally down..is this separation blues or what ..or do i still love my husband?

Few days after the separation , he needed to see the kids, i saw he has removed the ring...and has a earring on too(he never had this in our years together). I was shocked...i ask him why has he removed the ring...he said because i rejected him...went on ranting what i did etc..i could see he is angry that i did not return back before the offical separation( becas he has to paid child support and remove me from the business etc that he has debts as a result). Meanwhile, i told him 2weeks ago(when he want me back to the house) the only way i could separate and have peace/space i need for now and to heal our relationship is going legal/offically separate because i dont have any family here to stay with nor independent to maintain myself and the kids. if i am independent financially i would not need the govt social help or child custody allowance(they will ask him to pay which he cant afford).
So by removing the ring means what? i feel so sad after seeing this(the missing ring and ear ring). he does not realise anything about our relationship and still angry too. I feel so sad and down...since he has decide to continue to the next lady( We have official 2years before the finally divorce). Meanwhile we are suppose to meet with his and mine pastors in the coming weeks about our marriage. right now i just feel sad and dont know what to say.

[dreams3 0]

I am still yet to get an apartment for me and kids, the right job to fit my kids time...so many things i need favour for. I cant just do these on my own with the obstacles out there. I need Heavenly Dad help...if not i am despair. He is the only one I got. please keep me in prayers..i have been weak also in prayer/personal time...so distracted...i am asking God alot of whys....whats ...hows..wheres..whichs.

[daphanie02 0]

Praying for you! Hang on to Him!! He will lead you!

[dreams3 0]

Thanks i am better now.