My pastor has been speaking on the Promised Land. About crossing into our promised land instead of wandering around looking for it. Some of the key points that he mentioned and that rang true to me were that your promised land is an area in which you are naturally gifted and happy doing. It is something you love to hate (meaning it discourages you as much as it brings you joy).
I had a calling on my life as a writer, as a scribe. I knew this before he began speaking and as the teaching continued, I felt a confirmation of my calling. I knew where my promised land was. However, there were questions that didn't add up. I had a passion for music. I had been writing poems and songs since childhood and I didn't understand why God would give me such a passion if it was not my purpose. I went to God, on my knees, needing an answer. While I love to write, music is my true passion.
At the altar, I cried before the Lord, but praised Him for the gifts He had given me. Thanked Him for the calling on my life and asked that His will in my life be done and that I became the woman He has created me to be.
Two days later, I awoke at 5:20am. Since my alarm doesn't go off until 6:45, I was a LITTLE more than confused, but got out of bed and went to the bathroom. While I was in there, a melody began in my head. and I heard three words "What about now." The words fit the melody in my head and hearing the voice of my spiritual mother "Lord make me a ready writer" I grabbed my pen and notebook. The words flew onto the page and when I read them, it was like God was sitting next to me talking directly to me. I was floored. I laughed through my tears, because God answered my prayer. My passion is my purpose, but I had to LET HIM lead me. I can do nothing within myself, but when I let go of my own will for my future...God stepped in.
After worship practice that week, I met with the worship leader and I sang it to her, she found the chords and within moments I heard the song that God had sung to me, ringing out of the monitors in the empty sanctuary. Tears were flowing down my face and I have NEVER felt so FULL! There are no other words I was just FULL!
I know that this is just a taste of what God has for me, and I am grateful to Him for His endless Mercy and Grace! We are in process now of recording the song and I look forward to where God is going to take me from here.
For any who may be discouraged, know that God is no respector of persons. My life is NOT a picture of perfection, I am a REAL person with REAL issues, but God sees all of my mess, of your mess, and can see a willing heart. Stop trying to do things in your own power, release your life to Him and watch as He takes the mess and makes a masterpiece!