Christa

Thank you.

Cholette, you don't believe me? Narcissists are ego-centric. Everything is revolved around what I could do for him, and if I refused to do it, he would verbally abuse me....it would be my fault. He never once took me on a date. I even invited him out and offered to buy him dinner, he wouldn't go because he didn't have the time. I would say, "You never have time" and he would always laugh, in a mocking sort of way, like he would take pleasure in my pain of not being able to see him. I told him I needed to spend time with him at least two days a week (because he would go a couple of weeks without seeing me or even talking to me), or else I was going to break it off with him. He promised he could do a couple of days a week, but didn't follow through. Actually, after that promise, I didn't see him for 3 weeks. When we'd hang out, it would be about his pleasure, not mine....ever. He's the opposite of empathetic....would only ask me how I was doing as a lead into questioning me as to when we'd "get together" again. He would beg me to send nude pictures to him, and when I wouldn't he would abuse me and say, "Well, you don't know how to take care of your man then." It was my fault I had values. Deborah, no, I don't suffer with headaches... neck aches daily though. Sister, thank you for that....I feel like you understand what I'm going through. I know people's intentions with tough love are good, I've just come to take it as disrespect because I'm nearly 40 years old and I can choose to do what I wish. I don't intentionally date narcissists, but I attract them...once I'm in the relationship and all of the glory wears off, they start to act like themselves...doing less for me and then using lies, manipulation, or whatever to keep me around, because I take care of them well and make their lives better. For my daughter's and my sake, I'm completely withdrawing from dating until I'm emotionally healthy again. I'm also going on a hunt to find out how to immediately know whether a person is a narcissist or not. I don't want to be anywhere near any narcissists, whether male or female. It all boils down to being able to discern what is God and what is witchcraft, I suppose.

Thank you Deborah and Cholette. Yeah, I'm totally seeing the pattern....but in hindsight!!!! I need to be able to spot a narcissist from a mile away. I ended up bugging him the other day (calling him multiple times, texting him at the same time) to push him to the point of breaking up with me. It worked, and he broke up with me, but he's already tried once to suck me back in. Thank God I had the strength to ignore and delete his text, but if he tries again and again, and if I get increasingly lonely...I just don't trust myself. Yes, I need some deliverance from the ungodly soul-tie issues.... and healing. This guy drained the life out of me.

I have a boyfriend that is a narcissist. I've had the worst dreams about him trying to hurt me or leave me to die. Every time I tell him I want to break up, he begs me not to stop seeing him. When he met me, he lied and said he was a Christian and all sorts of good things. He's a poser and incapable of love, but we've done 'stuff' because I was weak and he's convincing. Now he keeps sucking me back into his web of lies, promising me love and all that, but all that occurs is us fooling around for a half an hour every 2-3 weeks. This guy is poison, but I have a hard time with narcissists because I'm really good at problem solving, and they have huge issues. They never want to break up with me because they get used to me being their doormat. I wish I could get mad enough to tell this guy to go fly a kite...but everything I've tried hasn't been working. God has really been good at sabotaging us getting together recently, but I need this ungodly soul tie severed for good, or made holy asap. However, I don't see us ever having a future or a holy relationship as long as he's a narcissist. I really need prayer.

Hey, remember this song: "Here's a little song I wrote.....might want to sing it note for note.....don't worry.....be happy.....don't worry, be happy now...... Oooo...ooo.....ooooo.....oooo.....ooo...ooo...oo...o...oooo...ooo...oooooo.....ooooooooooooooo....Don't worry.... ooo.oooo.oooo...ooooo...oooo.....ooooo....oooo.oooooo......Be happy.... oooo...oooo.....ooooo....ooo...oooo........ Don't worry, be happy now...." Doesn't this song make you want to visit a beach and basque in the sunlight?! Maybe even have a fruity drink with a little umbrella hangin' out the top. Hey all..... we're all going to get over our crap and see happier times! Believe it! It's true! Change is stability, and it's certain to happen... why not believe for happier times??!! You're blessed and not cursed!

Thanks you guys...you are awesome. God bless you all.

As you saw by my post yesterday, MAAAANNNN I was in a funk. Well, I just got some news that just broke it....completely unrelated, but it's the news I needed. I'm on the welfare system...food stamps and everything. They recently gave me all kinds of aptitude tests, and one in particular was called the Raven, which was an intelligence test. When the psychologists who oversaw the administering of these tests pulled me in to discuss them, they told me I didn't miss even one answer on the Raven. They said they'd never seen results like that before with Calworks recipients, and that I could be a doctor if I wanted to. I decided to look up Mensa, which is an organization for people who score within the 98th percentile of intelligence across the world. I applied to get into this organization, because my perfect score made me within the top 99th percentile. You guys....I got the acceptance email today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm freaking out a little...in a good way though! Wheeeew! Thank you, Jesus! Whoever thought a person on welfare would be the next Mensan member???!!!! Unbelievable! I so needed that good news today!

Court went badly in my opinion. The judge didn't grant the divorce, and didn't raise the child support up from $31 a month. I'm usually pretty good emotionally after court, but this time, I'm not doing so well with it because I thought I was done for a while. I'm not going to pursue the divorce further for now, because I'm just too tired emotionally. I'd be lying if I said I weren't angry, disappointed, sad, and just messed up over this limbo hell I'm in. I love Jesus, and I don't deserve all of the grace he's given me, so I just try to level myself thinking those things. However, I'm in a fog of denial and not happy. I do thank you all for your continued prayer. This site is awesome and very uplifting. Thank you for replying with your kind words. God Bless, Christa

Well, I have some good news followed by a prayer request. I got full custody of my daughter, and her dad still has supervised monitored visitations. I was finally granted a restraining order that protects my daughter and I, which doesn't deture him from driving by our house several times a month, but I'm grateful for what I have! I was also accepted into a state university all expenses paid with no loan debt! I'm now a junior majoring in Family Consumer Sciences and should receive my Bachelors of Science in a little over a year. You know, God is good! I did my best to remain in faith during these hard times, and He brought me through it with favor and blessings on top of it! My prayer request: I need peace when I go to court on Monday. I don't want to be nervous or anxious....or come out with a headache because I was in court all day. I just need it to be a short and sweet experience, with God's favor and protection for my daughter and I. My husband had threatened to kill me over $50- once, so he's no joy to be around...even if I'm in the confines of a protected and secured court house. I honestly wish he wouldn't show up, and that the judge will rule with what she sees as fair. I just don't want to deal with the guy anymore, he's a dangerous and violent criminal, and isn't good for my daughter or myself. He needs Jesus...and I pray for him constantly...that the Lord would bless him and draw him to Him. Thanks for your prayers. Hope everyone is doing well. ;)

Thank you, Daisy. My daughter's father was hanging around our house today, but wasn't within the 100 yards of being in violation of the restraining order....so, he didn't get picked up from the police. I have a praise report, though: God keeps making him visible to me. It's amazing how I've caught him near our house twice in less than a month. The police haven't caught him yet, but God is letting me know that He has an eye on him and is giving me a glipse of what's going on. It's like God is keeping me in the loop so that I won't let my guard down. This is one of those "Paul" moments, where a thorn is strategically placed in my side, yet God's grace is sufficient for me! So, I should be happy during this time and not let it affect my joy, because God allowed this thorn in my side for my better good down the road! Because in my weakness, his power is made perfect!Whew! I'm like David encouraging myself right now! God is good, and I know He loves me more than I can even comprehend. I'm so glad I'm His child and that Jesus died for me so that I could be adopted into His awesome Kingdom! Woo-hoo!

Thank you Connie. I promise I will let you guys know the praise report.

Thank you both so much! The prayers of the righteous availeth much. I believe in the power of prayer. Thank you for remembering me in your prayers. Have a nice Labor Day.

There's something about this year....it's like hot and cold. Either really good things are happening, or really bad things are happening. I got accepted in a university by such a miracle that it's hard to believe, but in the same week, I'd had the hardest custody issues I've ever had regarding my daughter. I don't know why God allows what he does, but honestly, my stomach is in knots over all of the stress I've been dealing with. This stomach pain started when I began having custody issues (in order to keep my daughter safe with me, and not watch her deteriorate in the care of her felon, drug addict father) two years ago. Please remember me in your prayers as I'm trying to raise a precious 3 year old on my own, and also protect her from him. Maybe you can agree with me that God will send her father to Alaska. I need to move on with my life, and I can't even bear the thought of dealing with this crap with her father; while taking 4 college classes plus raising a child in the way she needs to be raised (loving Jesus, honoring people, and having an excellent spirit). Thank you for your kindness. God bless.

Oh girl....I'm so sorry to hear that. I had a friend who committed suicide several years ago. She was convinced that Jesus wanted her to kill herself to be with him. It's just so sad. She was a genius, in that MENSA organization. I wish I would've gotten in her face every day, picked a fight with her or something, to show her a different perspective, or to get her to defend herself. I ignored the empathy I felt in my heart for her. The sting of her death still hurts to this day. God bless you, hun. Just try to be there for the family of your friend as much as you can. Suicide seems to be contageous and the spirit of depression and hopelessness needs to be broken off of this family.

Thanks Connie and Linda. Yeah, Linda....I'm so creeped out about Russia being mixed into the mess. God always confirms his messages to us a few times. He's starting to broaden the borders of our territories like he did Jabez. He always supplies givers with seed. We all as Christians need to have the guts to stand with Israel. You can share this with anyone you like. Thanks for replying!

I have to say, I'm glad that not one Israeli died. I'm sorry to say that 15 people who attempted to storm the border did. God wishes that no one should perish. I'm upset about the 15 who perished. If I were there, I probably would've risked my life to lay hands on those killed, to petition God to breathe life back into their bodies - for them to have a second chance. Israel has one of the most powerful armies in the world, but their opposition is so great now as their tiny nation is getting squeezed at the borders. Like Connie said, when these things start to occur in the world, as we come close to the Rapture and the Tribulation, we need to look up....because our redeption draws nye (near). Before Jesus comes, Israel will sign a peace treaty handing over it's rights once again. This is the very last sign before Jesus' return. Israel said that they will defend their borders by force if this happens again, but it's a challenging situation for them, as they don't really know the best way to handle this yet. The Islamic Palestinians, Lebanese, Syrians, Jordanians and Egyptians said this is the beginning of a new tactic they will be using: Storming Israel's borders on every side until Israel gives in or is forced to surrender and hand over their land. This will eventually happen in the form of a peace treaty. So here's the thing: If this is all going to happen anyway, then why should we even defend Israel in democracy? The answer is: Even if our government is against Israel, as Christians, we need to back her. Whether we go fight alongside Israel, or we donate money to their army....we as individual Christians need to contribute to the protection and sanctity of OUR Holy Land. Zech 14:2 says, "I will gather all the nations to Jerusalem to fight against it; the city will be captured, the houses ransacked, and the women raped." "All nations" includes North America you guys. If we as individuals don't sow into Israel, then we are in direct disobedience to God. I'd hate to be on the opposing side of even one of Israel's battles if not for any reason but this one------> Zech 14:3-4 "Then the LORD will go out and fight against those nations, as he fights in the day of battle. On that day his feet will stand on the Mount of Olives, east of Jerusalem, and the Mount of Olives will be split in two from east to west, forming a great valley, with half of the mountain moving north and half moving south." Just in case the Rapture doesn't come before the tribulation starts, we need to be protecting our Holy Land. We don't want Jesus giving us a butt-kicking because we opposed The Chosen. Even if all you can sow are seeds of prayer right now for Israel, please do it. If you have some money, or know some famous or rich people, please give some or talk someone into donating financially to the Israeli army. If you want to bless God, you'll bless Israel. They let people (men and women alike) from other nations join their army and contribute financially to it. They are going to need support now more than ever. If you want the website address to contribute to the Israeli army, please PM me and I'll give it to you. As the Islamic world is joining together to take Israel, it is our cue as Christians to now join together in our bigger masses and spiritually hold hands across that country. Please support Israel, love Israel, and pray for it's inhabitants, neighbors, and it's peace.

I have to say, I'm glad that not one Israeli died. I'm sorry to say that 15 people who attempted to storm the border did. God wishes that no one should perish. I'm upset about the 15 who perished. If I were there, I probably would've risked my life to lay hands on those killed, to petition God to breathe life back into their bodies - for them to have a second chance. Israel has one of the most powerful armies in the world, but their opposition is so great now as their tiny nation is getting squeezed at the borders. Like Connie said, when these things start to occur in the world, as we come close to the Rapture and the Tribulation, we need to look up....because our redeption draws nye (near). Before Jesus comes, Israel will sign a peace treaty handing over it's rights once again. This is the very last sign before Jesus' return. Israel said that they will defend their borders by force if this happens again, but it's a challenging situation for them, as they don't really know the best way to handle this yet. The Islamic Palestinians, Lebanese, Syrians, Jordanians and Egyptians said this is the beginning of a new tactic they will be using: Storming Israel's borders on every side until Israel gives in or is forced to surrender and hand over their land. This will eventually happen in the form of a peace treaty. So here's the thing: If this is all going to happen anyway, then why should we even defend Israel in democracy? The answer is: Even if our government is against Israel, as Christians, we need to back her. Whether we go fight alongside Israel, or we donate money to their army....we as individual Christians need to contribute to the protection and sanctity of OUR Holy Land. Zech 14:2 says, "I will gather all the nations to Jerusalem to fight against it; the city will be captured, the houses ransacked, and the women raped." "All nations" includes North America you guys. If we as individuals don't sow into Israel, then we are in direct disobedience to God. I'd hate to be on the opposing side of even one of Israel's battles if not for any reason but this one------> Zech 14:3-4 "Then the LORD will go out and fight against those nations, as he fights in the day of battle. On that day his feet will stand on the Mount of Olives, east of Jerusalem, and the Mount of Olives will be split in two from east to west, forming a great valley, with half of the mountain moving north and half moving south." Just in case the Rapture doesn't come before the tribulation starts, we need to be protecting our Holy Land. We don't want Jesus giving us a butt-kicking because we opposed The Chosen. Even if all you can sow are seeds of prayer right now for Israel, please do it. If you have some money, or know some famous or rich people, please give some or talk someone into donating financially to the Israeli army. If you want to bless God, you'll bless Israel. They let people (men and women alike) from other nations join their army and contribute financially to it. They are going to need support now more than ever. If you want the website address to contribute to the Israeli army, please PM me and I'll give it to you. As the Islamic world is joining together to take Israel, it is our cue as Christians to now join together in our bigger masses and spiritually hold hands across that country. Please support Israel, love Israel, and pray for it's inhabitants, neighbors, and it's peace.

Oh Ok then. Yeah, she's really anointed, and satan doesn't leave the anointed alone. Good thing Jesus stands in the gap for us and also prays for us. She's in good hands.

How did the ocean look? Was it pretty and clear? I'm wondering if you might be a little overly worried for her. Standing on a cliff, or "taking a plunge" is always scary, but "faith" is spelled R-I-S-K (something I heard recently). Water represents the Holy Spirit, so even if she ends up in it, she's in a good place. I'm confident she'll be fine. Jesus, please send your angels to protect Heidi as she goes about your business. We plead your blood over her right now and ask for a supernatural forcefield of your protection to cover her. Let your glory fall on these people so hard that they won't know what hit them. Bless Heidi, her helpers, and all of those she's witnessing to, in Jesus' name...Amen.

Appreciate you guys!

A couple of weeks ago, I read a thing that Breaking Christian News sent me regarding Israel. As some of you know on Sunday, May 15 is Israel's Independence Day. They became a nation again on 5/15/1948, so it will be their 63rd birthday. Israel is the only Democratic nation in the Middle East, and they're a friend to the United States. Breaking Christian News did a report exposing a Facebook coalition of at least 3,000,000 supporters to overthrow Israel once again, and on it's Independence Day 5/15/2011. This, apparently, is only one group, and there are other websites and Facebook pages gaining support (for Islam) to take back Israel. Israel is the Holy Land for Jews, Christians, and Muslims...especially the city of Jerusalem. "The plan" is to line up around Israel's border, and storm in. I know Israel's army is one of the most powerful in the world, but if something like this really goes down, a miracle is going to have to take place. If you know me well, you know that I dream. Most of my dreams are simply a call to pray and seek God about something, whether it's my own personal life, or the lives of others. Well, I had a dream last night that Israel was getting invaded and their meeting tents were getting pulled away from above their heads. They tried to hang on to the tents and got dragged away with them. Israel has been on my mind since that news story was sent to me, and the dream last night jolted me to post this prayer request. The Bible says to "pray for the peace of Israel." Over 900 times, the Bible also says that "Jerusalem belongs to the Jew." Please, pass this message on to those you think would care about Israel, so that we can all pray for the peace of Israel together. I'm also going to pray that these coalitions are nothing but idle chatter, and that everyone sleeps in that day, or has something better to do than to storm Israel. Or better yet, when those that show up to storm the border arrive there, let's pray that God will open their eyes to see the big, massive angels he's going to send to protect Israel. God, please save Israel once again! Raise up Davids in this time to defeat Goliaths! - Amen

Thanks Connie.....as always

Hi all......it's been a while. Hope everyone is doing all right. I'll be on the site more now if ya'll will still have me. I just found out right now that Osama Bin Laden was killed this week. There's a special news report happening right now on channel 7. About 10 years ago (2002, right after 9/11 happened), Sylvia Browne prophesied that he was already dead. Ten years ago, I was practically Buddhist and I listened to Sylvia Browne every Weds. on Montel Williams' show. Her influence is really strong among people who are hungry for the supernatural outside of Jesus, or who are in deep grief over lost loved ones. She's written many many books, and she markets her products really well. The thing is.......I feel sick about how she's deceived people. She's been given a soapbox...which has given voice to doctrines of demons. She's a false prophetess and a liar. I feel sick because she has a prophetic gifting that she doesn't glorify God with. I want her saved, or I want God to quiet her somehow. People are going to ignore that she has yet again prophesied something false, like Osama Bin Laden already being dead, and continue to listen to her. Mistakes can be made in prophecy, and God forgives the saved for these mistakes, but she is not operating under the Holy Spirit. Her "holy" spirit is a spirit guide named "Francine" if I remember correctly. Francine tells her everything. Please pray that God will send many laborers in her field, and that God would put a hedge of thorns above, beneath, and around her to wall her in, so that she won't find her way/path until she confesses that Jesus is Lord. If you pray this with me, please remember to put your full armor on before doing it. She has a serious forcefield of demons around her. Also, remember to pray for Montel Williams and the CBS tv distribution, that they will wake up and realize the deception and lies that are being televised. At the very least, they need to put a disclosure that she is "self-proclaimed," and viewers are not to put any clout in or take anything she says as fact.

The youngest aunt out of 22 aunts and uncles on my mom's side just found out she has terminal liver cancer. Non of my aunts or uncles have passed away on my mother's side of the family yet. She cannot be the first one to go! There's an order in dying, and the youngest one should not go first. If that's not in the Bible, well then, it should be. They won't even open her up because the cancer is all over the liver. The doctor said she's going to die if she doesn't get a liver transplant. She's not even 50 years old and she has two young adult children. She's Catholic. Please pray that God connects with her and restores her liver to that of a new born baby's liver. She doesn't smoke or drink, the only thing she does is eat too much of that really good/authentic Mexican food. Please help me pray, she could go at any given moment. I expect to have a good report for you in the very near future.

Do evangelists/missionaries have a church home? I don't know if that's a stupid question or not. I feel like I'm a missionary. Even when I've had church homes, God has moved me out pretty quickly. Every time I decide on a church home... is when God decides to move me. If pastors cover the body, who covers the pastors? I watch TV preachers for hours a day sometimes, so I know I get taught (maybe even overtaught sometimes). I go to conferences and volunteer in order to mix with believers. I've been cutting off ungodly soul ties recently, and my good friends are believers. I'm tired of searching for "a church," or even "the right church for me." I want a church to search for me for once. Uuugghhh.