Nyagali

Let me share with you how God has dealt with forgiveness in my own life. For me it has all hinged on the Truth of "you shall know the Truth and The Truth shall set you free". I spent many years with my husband doing drugs. He was an addict and along with that comes the baggage. We all have our own baggage and our own stories but the fundamental issues like forgiveness or neglect or pain are in a sense the same. Different stories, same issues. What the Lord shared with me was that I do not have the capapibility within myself to forgive. Jesus suffered and went to the cross and didn't do one single little tiny thing wrong--yet was a human like us. He depended on the Father for his life and every step he heard the Father speak to him. We experience wrong done to us by someone, as Jesus also experienced, yet, without sin. But most often we crumble and are offended until God takes our lives and shows us who is in control. How did Jesus let it go? How do we let it go? I tried and tried for a time to let the pain and hurts go, to forgive. I couldn't. I tried to do the right things, say the right prayers, read the word, hoping by doing the right things God would miraculously then do his part. But I knew deep inside that I couldn't forgive my husband for some things that had happened. I found out that isn't how he works in my life. Turning to God only lasted so long, then my junk started to come back up again...it was a cycle and it went on for years until one day I said, "enough of this!!" You see, this is where Jesus has to get us. A place where we come to where we recognize that we can do NOTHING without Him. Our weakness is his strength. How on earth can we get to this point without coming to see our weakness? God doesn't want us strong. We can't get there ourselves. He does it, or gets us to this point in life, by the difficult circumstances that come into our lives. Sorry, I don't know your name, but you have obviously had some doozies given to you! Hurt passes down from your parents, from these gentlemen, from lies and abuse, and here it is sitting on your shoulders. All I can say is get to KNOW THE TRUTH (that is simply Jesus, he is THE way, THE truth and THE life.) Somehow as he becomes more and more of your very fiber of life, how you think, what you think, where you turn in trouble......the hurt and bitterness and pain wash away. There is no formula I can offer. I'd love to have one. I've found all my answers simply in knowing The Truth--not just experiencing Jesus but KNOWING that I AM experiencing Jesus. Did you hear that? So for starters--look at the truth in your own situation. This man fooled you, abused your trust, ganged up on you with his buddies. That is the truth. You can't expect forgiveness from them if they see no wrong in what they did. That is also the truth. The truth is also that you can't forgive. That is the truth in the place you are before God. Be as honest as you can in your heart before God, he sees it all anyway. Keep talking this over with Jesus and he will take you through deeper and deeper until you find your heart changed. No formula, just listen to Jesus and he will heal your heart. Do YOU have to forgive them? I personally don't think so. That is what Jesus does. You can let them go and carry on. Jesus has promised, as the Word says, that HE will deal with those who hurt us. I think he can and will do a much better job than we can. Blessings to you. I pray you find some good friends that know Jesus and don't have all this baggage that these people have passed on. The truth also is that you can throw out baggage and garbage. God will take it and recycle it and do what He does with it. That isn't our concern. Move forward IN JESUS. "Putting the past behind" is only successful if you know God is taking care of it. When we think we have a part in it or a responsibility to have our part, then we are deceived and listening to the wrong teaching. Let me leave you with Colossians 1:14. In whom we have redemption through his blood, even the forgiveness of sins: Stop after you read the first 2 words. If you do not understand the the rest of the verse hindges on those 2 words, you will misunderstand this verse so easily! Your sister, Joy

I've never read "secular teaching" on this so not sure what they say. But if the dreams come from inside of us then I'm not surprised some are the same. Especially if the Lord keeps bringing up something for us to look at! I guess it would be a "take note" sort of thing....?? I don't have many repeats except for themes. What do you think? Joy

Jeanie, I've had one myself and lots of problems were solved, but when you are young there are other factors to consider and side affects you then have to live with the rest of your life--take out one body part and given enough time, the others drop down. .....but not so fun either! The Lord will give you peace one way or another and that will carry you through more than enough with the side-effects you have to live with! It is good you trust your Dr. Hysterectomies are probably the most "abused" (done without cause) operation done these days, from what I researched. Praying with you too. Joy

Amen Cholette! We are a child of the King Himself! He adopted us, He made us co-heirs, seated us with Him, loves us (number one!)....and SO much more. Know who you are (in Jesus Christ) and you will live that way without a thought of trying. Jesus does it all in you from the inside out. Blessings. Joy

God does have his ways of showing us that we can do NOTHING without him and that we have nothing without him. Yes, there is no hope without Jesus! Hugs to you too! joy

This is interesting because I just had coffee with one of my best friends and I asked her how her day went. She must work with your twin!! Just as you, she sees this person with compassion but she also said it is a draining day by the end when there is no response but hostility. My heart goes out to you sister. How much some people need Jesus, they don't see how their lives affect all those around them.

Maybe you better find a different place to groom your dog!! Sorry to be laughing so much at such a yukky situation but you are a great story teller!

My dear sister, what a beautiful saviour we have. He takes you from sorrow to joy. God is at work in our circumstances. Trust in Jesus, not what you see. Yet, you will see and your eyes will open and you will see Jesus. May you have some joyful times togeher.

is this a dream? Sorry to ask but I can't tell...I do hope it's not real...but you never know...

I agree Cholette, Sometimes for God to teach us we have to be taken away and retaught for a bit. It is so amazing to use the Strongs Concordance and find out what words come from....what is really the root word is. It can be so surprising. These 2 words have changed my life! You go from condemnation (and we are not supposed to live in condemnation) to knowing that Jesus produces our life and he is our life. Yes Halo, if the church doesn't preach Jesus there isn't much point in being there. If they don't preach Jesus you never get free because there will always be that little bit of performance you have to keep up with. When Jesus strips that away it is amazing how much JUNK is free to come out of us. I cried every single day that first year we stopped going to church. I couldn't believe it but I had so much in me that I held in and held back and when we stopped going it was like a waterfall that couldn't stop! It took several years to find a group that was in a place we felt Jesus taking us to. Not every home group is good either! We found that one out. It's not about the church or the home group it is about where the focus of the group is. I'd be lost without our home group though. I hate missing ONE week now. I love the people and the fellowship and the sharing that is focused on Jesus, not on what I have to do. If we really get to know that Jesus is our life, that he lives in us the focus on life becomes HIM, not me. joy

Isn't it refreshing?!! I know I have a lot to re-learn. When I shared this with my husband he said that it is interesting that the very center of a castle is also called the "keep". Everything of importance is kept there and it is almost impenetrable to the enemy! YAH! Joy

Just read this today.....how wonderful to see how God dealt with this situation! LOL....He has a sense of humor sometimes....using toilet poopies and all!

What do you think of when you hear "keep my commandments..."? I know in my past I thought immediately about what I had to do to keep the commandments. If you look in Strong’s Concordance you will see the root word of keep means "to watch, to guard, keeping the eye upon or hold fast". Doesn't that give you a different understanding? Think of it in this way. Your mom gives you a locket "to keep", do you do anything once you have possession of it? No, you guard it, you keep your eye on it and hold it fast. There is no action you need to take to keep the locket. This is what God meant when he said to "keep His commandments". Guard them closely, hold on to them. What a wonderful way to keep the commandments! The other word that is very misunderstood is the word "obey". How often is the word obey used as a command or as a threat in your life from those in authority? Without fail, if you look at the prime root word of "obey" it means "to hear" in the Bible (Old and New). Let me show you a few different ways obey is used and the root word of it in each context. For parents and children it means "to hear under (as a subordinate) to listen attentively". Peter says "if any of you obey not the word...", this one comes off of "willful disbelief or disobedient". Pretty much without fail all the OT words come out of a prime root word meaning "to hear intelligently, often with the implications of attention, obedience etc. or to consider, be content, discern, give ear." The Bible uses this word a lot of times. The NIV uses it 223 times and the New KJV uses it 156 times. (One reason, among others, to show that the NIV is not a good translation and focuses more on our part than Jesus.) Hearing is listening to God and obeying is what we do when someone speaks. If you understand the root word of obey means to hear, you can see how it fits together, but how often has that been taught? I think I shared this in another place here: I used the example of parents and children. A child does not obey or do what the parent has said if they have not heard the parent speak first. Sometimes they don’t obey or hear because of their comprehension, sometimes they are willfully disobedient, but often, just like we are with God, we are so preoccupied in our own minds we can't hear Him speak. The crux of our relationship with God lies in hearing God, not in what we do for God. If we don’t know what he means when he speaks then we will always fall back on what we DO. To hear God is the very power to do (obey) what he says to us. This is the meaning of grace too: God's divine provision to enable us to fulfil HIS purpose in our lives. Now when you read these two words in the Bible I trust the Lord speaks truth and understanding. Your sister, Joy

Great News! Thanks for sharing. And in your weakness you were a witness of Christ in You to the Doc! I love so many of the Psalms. David shared so much out of his weakness but understood who his life was. Joy